Image of the Day: I want to be a Red Head like Rita Hayworth

I discovered this woman when I was around 12 years of age.  Rita Hayworth, one of the most glamorous movie starlets of yesteryear, is the reason why I've always wanted to be a red head.  She was one of the top pin ups, behind the incomparable Betty Grable, of World War II.  Sadly, I am unable to pull red hair off, but I know a certain law student in Virginia, ahem Ashley W., who can with finesse.

Inspiration: Ruffled Bust

Cocktail Dresses
Tops

Ensemble of the Day: I Got a Red Dress and New Hair Edition

I feel like a cowgirl in this pretty, cotton, red-orange dress, mostly because of the awesome ruffle detail on the bust of the dress.  If I threw on my fabulous cowboy boots, I could have stepped right out of that film Urban Cowboy.  I bought it for $8 at a Goodwill in Fairfax County.   I never wore red until I found a fantastic onesie at the Forever 21 in South Korea and bought a beautiful red dress from Top Shop in the Philippines.  I love how saturated the color of the dress is; it looks very flattering on someone with a nice tan.  Basically me.  I paired the dress with some pretty gold bangles, a bronze belt with starfish detail on the buckle, and a red and gold necklace.  It's one of those easy things to throw on when you haven't got time to think about your outfit.

(Here's a Southern Belle secret from way back then.  They use to sew ruffles on the inside of the bust line on the bodice to push up the breasts to the top of the dress.)  A ruffle on the outside of the bodice is a great way to create the illusion of having a large bust.  Have you ever seen Korean bathing suits?  The majority have ruffles on the bust.  I love ruffles because ruffles are ruffles, but I will not begrudge anyone increasing their bustiness through use of optical illusions.  Lord knows that miracle bra from Victoria's Secret nets me more tips than my charm.  I got tired of the necklace so I took it off and threw on a scarf (the scarf that Stephanie tried to wrest from my possession).

This dress style was very popular in the early 1980s.  I have a white dress similar in silhouette, and it's very flattering when belted.  Look how tiny my waist and arms look!  Another optical illusion.  I love dresses that flare at the bottom because they cause one's waist to look small.

Legs

I show them off because they're my best asset.  If I could monetize them I would.

Fin

Ensemble of the Day: Polka You in the Eyeball

When I woke up, I was 5"2.  When I left for work, I was 5"7.  Today, I did the following activities in these hot pink espadrilles:

1. Booty Popped.
2. Booty Hopped.
3. Cabbage Patched.
4. Did the robot.
5. Told somebody off.
6. Drove Lulu and eluded the po po.
7. Ran down a flight of stairs without ruining my face by smushing it on the ground. 

Today was a win.  On the outside, I looked like Grace Kelly.  On the inside, I felt like Tallulah Bankhead, badass Southern Belle of the 1930s, 40s, and 50s from Alabama.

I was all business at the top.  Pretty bow earrings, crisp white collared shirt, ostrich pin.  Below was quite the party.  I was wearing a wonderful vintage polka dot skirt, described in this post.  I threw on the hot pink espadrilles because it was missing that Jacinta element.  Coco Chanel famously said, Before you leave the house, look in the mirror and take one thing off."  UMM NOPE.  I always add one thing, because that's what makes me, me.

Image of the Day: Carla Bruni-Sarkozy

BEAST!  SHE WAS A BEAST! Carla Bruni looks like a cat and I love it.  This is what plastic surgery cat lady Jocelyn Wildenstein would have looked like had she started her surgeries in the 2000s instead of whenever she began them.  But yo, this woman messed up her face.  I can't even bring myself to put that photo on here so you can google it yourself.  FYI She is a former model/singer/actress married to the former president of France.

Dear Owl Customers...Part Four

Dear Sir, 

You were not in my section, but I played rock-paper-scissors with you because I was bored and I knew the lone fat man in my section would not be tipping at all (I was right, he tipped two dollars.  Yeah I stereotype.  And they always come out right!).  You told me to go get whatever merchandise I wanted, so I grabbed the undies, natch.  You then gave me a $100 tip.  I came back to the table huffing and puffing because I was doing the running man in the back.  Because of your generosity, you made my day and I was able to pay rent.  I'll never forget your face, especially since I found out later you tipped your own server $500.00.  You will be sitting in my section next time.

Thanks,

J

Ensemble of the Day: My Dress Threw Up a Rainbow Edition

Virginia sucks.  The stores do not.  I found this dress in Fairfax a couple weeks ago at Yesterday's Rose, the same shop where I found that AMAZING mint dress discussed in this post.  I LOVE SHEER DRESSES.  I really do.  I love that I can wear them in every season and regulate my temperature by adding layers.  I bought this dress for the drop waist.  I love the twenties.  Love them.  I love how flattering drop waist dresses can be with the right construction.  I love that there are so many colors on this dress.  I love the scarf-like collar.  I felt like a fashionable clown.

I love the fact that this dress wasn't made in China (Label says Korea, but this is not in sync with Korean style as I know it).  It is very difficult to find clothes these days not made in China, Malaysia, Pakistan, or the Philippines.  I try try try to avoid modern clothes, with companies using dubious labor practices and all.  So yeah, you can call me a fashion environmentalist since I purchase mostly vintage or used clothes.  Does this make up for me taking long showers?  I know, I am contribution to the depletion of fresh water sources.

I could not even tell you what year this dress was made.  I can tell you that my washer almost ripped it to shreds and I gave said washer a good scolding.

The pattern is strange, and if I stand the wrong way I'll look like Wally the Walrus, but I love this dress.

Dear Owl Customers...Part Three

I know you think I was looking at you like this:

But I was really looking at you like this:

Image of the Day: Jazz Great Big Jay McNeely

That must have been a good song.

I need to have an experience that puts me in the same state as those three men in the front.

I Need This Dress Like I Need to Pay for that Parking Ticket in DC...Now!

 Yes.  This dress is reserved for me.  Contacted the owner and was like "LADY THIS DRESS BE MINE!"  I still haven't decided though.  I don't have a life.  Where am I going to wear this beautiful thing?  That emerald green and the big ass bow just scream drama.  And as the winner of most dramatic at Duke University, I think it should be in my closet.  I need to think about it for one more hour.  And it's in my size.  And it's my favorite color.  I'm trying to justify $125 right now.  I used my tax return responsibly.  I work really hard to have the things that I want.  ETC...

Check out one of my favorite Etsy.com stores, Quirk Vintage Clothing!